When Sons and/or Daughters Rebel – Sunday Thought For The Day

The insolence and blatant lack of respect many children show their parents today is tragic.  To which I add, said is not age restricted.  In October alone six solidly Christian families have shared with me about the disrespect and callous behavior they’re being shown by their adult children.  Three of the families I reference have grandchildren they are estranged from because of an adult child through no fault of their own.

We as true born again Christian parents can do everything right to the very best of our ability, and yet our children can turn against us, be disrespectful, snarlish and inconsiderate.  No matter how well we raise them, they can make choices in their personal lives that we as Godly adults intuitively know are going to be fraught with undesirable outcomes, both personally and spiritually.

Our sons and/or daughters can take spouses with a Jezebel spirit or who have Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).  Neither of those demonic behaviors are limited to the unsaved, which is what makes such demonic traits more insidious.

I can site other godless behaviors by our children, both adolescent and/or adult, including those raised in solid biblical, Christ-centered homes turning to drug abuse, alcoholism the abomination of homosexuality/lesbianism, and abortion.

Every father and mother who has dealt with or is dealing with this issue does so with a heavy heart.  Biblical Christian counseling is one avenue for the rebellious, insolent child or the adult child.  But, in the refusal or absence of same, we ultimately have limited choices.

Depending upon the hostility, we may take the position of explaining our love for them, but that we will not be subjected to their disrespectful behavior, even if there are grandchildren involved.  We cannot abide sin and disobedience out of our love for them.  God is long-suffering, but He doesn’t make peace with sin and disobedience, and neither should we as parents.

It is however, imperative to remember that Satan is the enemy of our souls.  He and/or his demons stand ever ready to destroy and kill.  Jesus Himself warns us of this in John 10:10: The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. (KJV)

I remind you of this because over my years in ministry, I have seen many parents blame themselves for the bad decisions and behavior(s) made by their children.  I counsel you; every man, woman, and child are responsible for their own actions.  Yes, as parents we can contribute to godless bad decisions and godless behavior of our children, but that just makes parent and child co-parties to sinful behavior.

Which, brings me to the parents who weren’t enablers to the hateful, belligerent behavior of their children toward them.  We must turn to Our great God and Savior Jesus Christ for peace and strength.  Too many parents fall into a malaise of sorrow and self-condemnation for the child’s actions.  The other thing many god-fearing, good parents do is embrace the idea that the children are turning their backs on them.  I remind those parents of the words of Jeremiah 32:33 And they have turned unto me the back, and not the face: though I taught them, rising up early and teaching them, yet they have not hearkened to receive instruction. (KJV)  The children are not turning against you as parents; they are turning against God.

In accordance with scripture, I refer such parents as referenced above to Luke 12: ⁵² For from henceforth there shall be five in one house divided, three against two, and two against three^{.   53} The father shall be divided against the son, and the son against the father; the mother against the daughter, and the daughter against the mother; the mother-in-law against her daughter-in-law, and the daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. (KJV)

Which brings me to the important closing point.  At some point, we must leave the hardhearted child to the Lord.  We love them and most importantly we must pray that God will soften their hearts and bring them to repentance.  I know some reading this are experiencing this hardship.  But, to them I say, be faithful and be firm in the Lord.  He alone can soften the hardest heart.  Let us, as parents do our best by the power of the Holy Spirit in us, to live righteously before God and man.

God can do what we cannot.  I know, because He changed me when it appeared that I would be lost forever.  If God could change me, there is hope for all.  As parents we cannot stop believing that God hears our prayers and will do what we cannot.

My friends, we must not just read the bible; we must ask God to apply it to our daily lives and whatever challenges we are confronted with.

To the families I mentioned in the opening paragraph.  Keep the faith, do not succumb to self-recrimination.  Believe with all of your heart that God has not abandoned you nor is he punishing you.  Read God’s word; do not allow the enemy to rob you of your joy or deceive you into doubting our Savior.

READ:

Isaiah 40:28-31 (KJV)

28 Hast thou not known? hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary? there is no searching of his understanding.

29 He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.

30 Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall:

31 But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.